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Learning the lingo

This glossary is intended as a guide to many of the terms you might hear in the consanguinamorous community.

CLOSETED CONSANGUINAMOROUS RELATIONSHIP: 1. A consanguinamorous relationship that presents itself as a conventional family relationship. For example a brother and sister who are secretly in love, but pretend to just be conventional non-romantic siblings while around others. 2. A consanguinamorous relationship that presents itself as a conventional relationship between non-relatives. For example, a brother and sister who move to another state or country where no one knows they are related, and they present themselves as a conventional married couple.

CONSANG: Colloquial Of or related to consanguinamory; as, a consang relationship, a consang person.

CONSANGUINAMORY: (literally consanguinitas blood relation + amor love) The state or practice of maintaining a sexual and/or romantic relationship with a close family member or relative. Consanguinamorous: of or related to the practice of consanguinamory, as in consanguinamorous relationship: a relationship involving people who are close family members or relatives; consanguinamorous person: a person who prefers or is open to a romantic relationship with a family member or relative. Contrast exogamy.

DOUBLE-LOVE BOND: See erostorgia.

EROSTORGIA: (literally eros passionate love or romantic love + storge familial love) The simultaneous experience of familial bonding and intimacy, with romantic bonding and intimacy.

EXOAMORY: (literally exo outside + amor love) The state or practice of maintaining a sexual and/or romantic relationship with someone who is not a close family member or relative. Contrast consanguinamorysee also exogamy.

EXOGAMY: (literally exo outside + gamos marriage) The state or practice of marrying outside the tribe, family, clan, or other social unit. Contrast consanguinamory.

FAMILY MEMBER WITH BENEFITS: A relationship in which two (or more) family members establish a friendship that includes sex or sexual activity, but without romantic love and usually without the same kind or level of expectations or other entanglements that usually come with romantic relationships.

FULL MARRIAGE EQUALITY: A basic human right where any and all consenting adults are able to share and enjoy love, sex, residence, and marriage without discrimination or limitation based on sex, gender, sexual orientation, number, or relation of the participants. Many people in the consanguinamory community advocate for full marriage equality, which includes consanguinamorous marriage equality.

GENETIC SEXUAL ATTRACTION (GSA): A term used for the sexual attraction that may develop between close genetic relatives who were separated within the first few years of life and first meet as adults. People who experience genetic sexual attraction don’t experience the Westermarck effect toward the person they are attracted to and may or may not enter a consanguinamorous relationship.

GSA (acronym): See genetic sexual attraction.

GSA RELATIONSHIP: A consanguinamorous relationship between two relatives who first meet as adults and who have experienced genetic sexual attraction.

INCEST: An ambiguous word with two very different meanings: 1. Rape, sexual assault, or molestation by a close family member or relative, and 2. Consensual sex or marriage between close family members or relatives. The first meaning is generally how non-consanguinamorous interpret the word and such acts of violence are condemned by the consanguinamory community and they have nothing to do with consanguinamory. The second meaning – consensual sex and/or marriage – is often what happens when two people in a consanguinamorous relationship wish to express their love for each other. Because of the ambiguous nature of the word and the two polar opposite meanings, many people in the consanguinamory prefer not to use the word incest.

INCESTOLOGY: The study of incest and all things related incest.

INCESTOPHOBIA: Dislike of or prejudice against incestuous people.

NON-GSA RELATIONSHIP. A consanguinamorous relationship between two family members or relatives who grew up together.

WESTERMARCK EFFECT: A phenomenon that occurs in most people and which causes them to be desensitized to sexual attraction toward people who live in close domestic proximity during the first few years of their lives. For some people this includes even being physically repulsed by the thought of a sexual relationship with a family member. People in non-GSA consanguinamorous relationships, as well as some people in GSA consanguinamorous relationships, lack the westermarck effect.